Dipper Pines, Paranormal Detective p 17

Jack Frost floated through the air blissfully singing to himself.

"Back in black, da da de de do, I don't know the words but Jaaaaaaack is baaaack!"

"Pretty sure that's not how that song goes." Dipper commented.

"Oh whatever, listen you go find your Blonde Bombshell and I'm going to go check on the Icecube and the pixie gnat."

"Jack, I have just one question."

"What's that, Flip-A-Dip-Dip?"

"Don't call me that. Never call me that. Ever! My question for you is why can I see you right now? I'm not wearing the goggles!"

"Oh well that's simple, I'm just allowing you to. That's all."

This struck a nerve with Dipper. The goggles were his first successful invention as a child, for them to be unnecessary for their intended purpose was infuriating.

"Excuse me?!"

"Of course, I only let you use those goggles so much because I thought they made you look funny!"

"You dick!"

Dipper was about to really lay in to him when Siegfried's roar finally reached their part of the cave.

"What was that? I thought you only locked up Siegfried and his croonies!"

"I did!! Listen, you go find your girl and I'll look in to this!"

"Wait, no Jack! I don't think that's a very good..."

"Relax Gumshoe, I'm back in the saddle! Jack is back! I can handle anything now!"

Before Dipper could protest further Jack flew down the cave to investigate the roar.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Pacifica looked down at the totem rock, successfully cut in two. She ejected the burnt battery and tossed it over her shoulder.

"Pacifica!! Where are you?"

She jumped a little when she heard Dipper's voice calling out for her.

"Over here, Dipper!"

"Where? The cave is getting darker!"

It was true, the light from the cave ceiling was dimming more and more. So Pacifica pulled out Dipper's flashlight, given to her alongside with his gun, and flicked on and off in the direction she thought she heard his voice. He spotted her right away, having a small flashback to when she was playing with the flashlight in the secret room of her mansion from when they were twelve.

Running over to her he gave her a quick hug.

She blushed slightly but didn't object. When it broke she quietly handed him his gun and flashlight back; they shared a smile.

"I think we did it. Jack's looking in to something right now but so long as it's nothing too big I think all we have to do slap the cuffs and get out of here."
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Jack had been traveling in the direction he had heard the roar but decided to stop when he found something truly interesting to himself.

"Bart? That actually you?"

The unicorn was freed from his ice cube but he was as limp as a rag doll. "Bart, I know you're not dead! I saw you blink!"

Jack knelt down and picked up Bart's head to look him in the eye. "Bart, can you speak?"

"I..."

Jack let go Bart's head believing that if the unicorn was well enough to explain himself then he would be well enough to hold up his head by himself. His belief was misplaced as Bart's head fell straight to the ground.

*THUD!*

"My bad. I thought you were ready." He picked up Bart's head a second time but this time he made sure Bart could lift his head all by himself. "Okay, now what happened?"

"Sieg..."

*THUD!*

Bart's head fell to the left landing on the ground. Jack rolled his eyes and picked up Bart's head a second time, the neck was wobbling but Jack trusted it to keep the head up. "Stay with me now. Who did this to you?"

"The bo..."

*THUD!*

Bart's head had now fallen to the right side causing Jack to throw his arms up in frustration. "THIS IS RIDICULOUS!!!"

This time he picked up Bart's head by his horn and looked him straight in the eye. "Enough's enough! WHAT HAPPENED?!" Jack hollered.

"IT WAS SIEGFRIED!!!" Bart hollered back. "He went nuts!! He aint even a dwarf no more!! He's some kind of monster, attacking everything in sight!! He's gonna bring this whole cave down!! Poor Ruthless, it's a miracle she's even alive right now..."

"Wait, that Cherry Flavored Lightning Bug is around here somewhere?"

Jack looked around trying desperately to spot her. He couldn't see her which meant she wasn't glowing at the moment. Not a good sign for her kind. "Ruth?"

"I'm over here..." she weakly called out.

Jack winced. "Oooh... Feeling some pain there? Don't worry ya Homicidal Butterfly, I'll get Dipper and Pacifica to help you." He turned back to Bart. "Now your boss, which way did he go?"

"He charged down the way you came and we haven't seen him since." Bart explained.

"Your brain must've been rattled in the attack. If he went down the way I came don't you think I would've at least passed him? I didn't see anybody, especially not 'some monster'."

"That's the thing about caves, Snowflake..."

A distant sound of crashing rocks caught Jack's attention. He turned around to see the monster Siegfried barreling towards them smashing everything in his path.

"It's easy to get turned around inside."

"Dear God, what has he done to himself?" Jack let go of Bart's horn. *THUD!* "Don't worry you two. I won't let him hurt you anymore."

Ruth and Bart looked at him with shocked awe. Twin whirlwinds of snowflakes spun themselves around Jack's hands as he readied himself to intercept the charging Siegfried.

"What?!" Ruth shrieked.

"Why?! You hate us!! You locked us in a mountain cave for a hundred and fifty years!! Why would you risk your life for ours?! Especially after we tried to kill you!!" Bart exclaimed.

Jack looked over his shoulder and gave the two henchmen a smile which very few had seen before. It was an honest smile. "I wanted you stopped not killed."

Bart looked up at Jack with confusion.

"What?"

"Although I do admit, I probably should've let you out a hundred years ago. I acted as judge, jury, and executioner so forgetting about you is something I never should have allowed myself to do. You probably felt like you had no choice to steal my very being to get your freedom. And for that, I'm sorry. On the plus side, I heard we recently got judges, juries, and executioners just for magical schmucks like us. So if we live you'll probably get a better sentence from them. Right now though, I have to make sure we live to see it!"

Jack rose in to the air and thrusted his hands forward. A blizzard immediately raged forth from them, covering the entire area in front of him. Siegfried met the blizzard full force, and while it gave him a good dusting of snow it did little to slow him down.

"He's not stopping!!!"

"Oh this isn't what's supposed to stop him. Don't you worry your pretty little horn about that. THIS is supposed to stop him!!"

A wall of ice started to form in front of Jack. The more the blizzard blew the thicker and larger it seemed to get.

"AN ICE WALL?! YOU THINK AN ICE WALL IS GOING TO STOP HIM?! HE'S BEEN SMASHING SOLID ROCK LEFT AND RIGHT!!!"

"It's not supposed to stop him. Trust me here, I'm a Jack Of All Trades!"

The ice wall was large enough to block Siegfried's path but the noticeable thing was it shone with a reflection like a mirror. The stampede came to a halt as Siegfried stared in to his own reflection curiously, like it was some strange new oddity that had yet to be viewed by the world. He graced one of his giant fingers against his reflection.

"Siegfried, if there's any rational part of you that's still in there then LOOK AT YOURSELF!! You've sacrificed everything of who you were for revenge, but if you surrender now then maybe you can salvage what dignity you have left before I kick your bu..."

Siegfried smashed the ice wall roaring with a mindless rage. The shattered ice chunks flying everywhere, Jack did his very best to maneuver out of the way.

"Or you could just rage quit in to temper tantrum trying to kill everyone. Sigh. You really are gone in there aren't you?" Jack was brought out of his musing when he felt a pair of eyes burning the back of his head. He looked to see Bart giving him an unimpressed glare.

"What?!"

"'Jack Of All Trades' huh? More like a Jack-Ass!"

"..."

"Jack?"

"Okay, that was a good shot. That's a point for you. I have absolutely no argument against you there."

"So what are you gonna do now?!" Ruth shrieked.

"Well if reason isn't gonna work, I'll have to use force!"

Jack flew to intercept Siegfried but he had already begun his attack. He flailed his giant arms around trying to crush Jack like some crazed gorilla would try to swat a gnat in the air. Jack threw his arms out and icicles shot out of his hands like bullets. Crashing against the stone behemoth they did little other than shatter, forcing Jack to think of a different tactic.

Jack clapped his hands together and then spread them apart, a snowy white energy was starting to circulate in the space between; he threw his arms to the side as if he were holding some giant thing as the energy left no space left. I giant icicle spear appeared in his arms from the white energy, Jack nearly fell from the new weight but managed to catch himself appropriately.

"If a bunch of little ones won't work, then let's try one big one!"

Jack flew at Siegfried with a wordless battle cry, set to impale the giant rock monster he aimed the giant icicle at his head. Siegfried caught it with both hands when it was only a few feet away from his head, he tightened his grip on it to the point where his fingers actually dug in to the ice.

"That's not good."

Huge cracks started to form in the icicle starting from his finger punctures moving up to the base towards Jack. Reaching the end, the icicle spear shattered sending Jack flying backwards. He slid on the ground but got back up as if nothing had happened to him. He rolled up what little sleeves he had and marched his way back to Siegfried.

"Alright Siegfried, I was hoping it wouldn't have to come to this but it's like the old saying goes. If you can't take the heat... cheat!!

Jack flew straight Siegfried's head, but just as Jack got within arm's reach of Siegfried he disappeared. Siegfried looked around but Jack was nowhere to be seen.

However, he was so busy looking for Jack he didn't notice the frost starting to accumulate on his right arm. It started with a full circle around Siegfried's arm and moved it's way down towards his fingers in a spiral. The frost turned to ice which only got thicker finally earning Siegfried's attention. He eyed it curiously, his arm was getting heavier as the ice got thicker.

*CRACK!*

A large crack appeared in his arm but it went far deeper than just the ice.

*CRACK!**CRACK!**CRACK!**CRACK!**CRACK!*

With multiple cracks running across his arm, the stone it was made up of finally gave way to the brittleness and crumbled away. Shockingly, Siegfried barely reacted to this at all. Not unlike how one would react to receiving a paper cut or accidentally biting their cheek.

"OH COME ON!!" Jack reappeared in mid air. "That was your FRIGGIN ARM!!! It should have at least hurt!!"

Siegfried roared yet again, slamming his fist in to Jack's body sending him flying in to the cave wall. His body left a decent sized indent which he seemed to be stuck inside of.

"Was that... supposed to hurt? Because I don't feel pain again and..."

Jack blacked out in his hole leaving him to Siegfried's mercy. Siegfried stared down at Jack unconscious form with a predatory smile when a distant sound caught his ear distracting him from his prey.

"Oh Dipper, you're so funny..."

"Thanks, but watch out for that ledge."
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Seriously, Mabel was covered in syrup for three days after that!"

"Haha. You know how to really make a girl feel better after a stressing adventure, ya know that?"

"Thanks, so you really cut this totem thing right down the middle huh?"

At the their feet the totem rock sat in two pieces sticking out of the ground.

"Yeah, it was all thanks to that one on one training you gave me."

"Yes well I... Do you hear that?"

"Yeah, what is that? Was that the noise Jack was supposed to get on top of?"

They squinted in the distance and saw Siegfried barreling towards them and closing fast.

"WHAT IS THAT?!"

"STAND BACK, PACIFICA!!"

Dipper got down on one knee and pulled out his gun.

*PLOOT!**PLOOT!**PLOOT!*

Three blasts of goop shot towards Siegfried. However, Siegfried managed to dodge these shots when he slammed his fist on the ground catapulting the rest of his body in to the air. The shots sailed underneath him harmlessly as he hurdled through the air closing in on his human opponents. He reached his hand towards Pacifica for a midair grab. Time seemed to slow down as his hand got closer and closer to grabbing her.

"PACIFICA!!! LOOK OUT!!!"

At the last second Dipper pushed Pacifica out of the way forcing the creature to grab him instead, sending them both careening over the ledge. Inside Siegfried's grip Dipper quickly adjusted his gun to the whip, thankfully Siegfried only had him by the waist, and lashed his whip up to the top. The goop wrapped around the two pieces of the stone totem forcing them together. However, the stone almost got pulled out of the ground by Dipper and Siegfried's combined weight had Pacifica not suddenly grabbed it. She was pulling with all her might but the only thing keeping the rock grounded was her also trying to force it deeper in to the ground. And in all honesty it wasn't working too well, she and the rock were being dragged to the ledge so she tried to dig her feet in to the ground.

Dipper looked down at the monster Siegfried who was writhing about like some strange animal and then he looked up to the ledge, his last minute trick was working but not well enough. And from the sounds of the grunting from above, Pacifica was trying to help. He could see her now, desperately trying to keep his anchor from going over, she was probably going to end up going over with him. There was one thing he could do to save her but it was pretty drastic. He looked down at Siegfried and then back up at Pacifica, his choice was clear.

"Pacifica listen to me! You can't hold on to that, and we can't let this thing reach the surface! It looks like we're going to have to make a pretty hard decision!"

Pacifica knew almost instantly what Dipper was talking about and she refused to accept it.

"Don't say that! We'll find a way out of this together!" She tried to reach her hand to get a hold of some the goop but it was no good, she couldn't risk letting go of the rock. "Just like we always do!!"

Dipper pulled out his dagger and gave Pacifica an apologetic look. "I'm sorry Pacifica, but I'm taking the decision out of your hands."

"No Dipper don't!! No no no please!!! DIPPER, YOU CAN'T DO THIS!!! PLEASE!!!"

In one quick swipe Dipper cut the goop line sending both him and the monster Siegfried plummeting down in to the darkness.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Pacifica got on all fours and pulled up the goop line desperately only to find the end Dipper cut. "No..."

She stared down in to the abyss in a desperate hope that perhaps Dipper landed on a ledge or something. Only darkness met her, but as a certain numbness started to take hold something from the darkness flew up. She sat up as it fluttered all the way up to her, it was Dipper's hat. It landed delicately on her lap with the hole in it facing her.

She picked it up and held it tightly against her chest. And then, she broke down. The tears came flooding down as she sobbed uncontrollably.

Dipper was dead. Gone from her life forever. And how was she supposed to move on now? With no Dipper to greet her in the morning, no Dipper to explain a crazy situation or complicated contraption, no Dipper to offer support when she would get herself caught in a dangerous corner, and no Dipper to comfort her when she felt vulnerable. She wasn't sure how long she stayed and cried but it must have been hours, that's how it felt anyways. She was all alone now. How was she supposed to move on?

"WOO HOO!!" Jack's voice rung out from behind her. "Sure am glad that whole mess is over with!"

Pacifica tightened her grip on Dipper's hat. It seemed like an insult for Dipper to die and for a dick like Jack to still be around.

"Whoa!" Jack was floating in the air but low enough to the ground that he saw Pacifica's face. "What's with the waterworks? Seriously, who died?"

"DIPPER DID!!!" Pacifica gave Jack a harsh shove away from her. He floated over the ledge and gave her a look of shocked surprise. "He SACRIFICED himself and now I'm... now he's..."

"Hey. Hey." Jack floated over and lifted her chin to look him in the face. "It's okay. He's not dead."

"...what..."

He point over to her left. "See?" There Dipper stood alive and unharmed. "Dipper's still alive."

Pacifica stood up and weakly walked over to him. She caressed her hand against his cheek and felt the little bristles of his shaved facial hair.

"But how..?"

"Jack. He saved me with that snow trick at the last..."

*SLAP!*

It took Dipper a moment to register the slap he just received from Pacifica, given how quick she had given to him he couldn't help but look back at her in confusion. However, the look on her faced seemed to tell it all. Pacifica glared at him through tear filled eyes as Dipper rubbed the cheek Pacifica had slapped tenderly.

"Do you have ANY idea how scared I was?! YOU WERE GONE!!! HOW SAD I... And I thought... I thought..."

She broke down again but this time she was sobbing in to Dipper's shoulder. He was taken back at first by the gesture but relaxed and put his arms around her comfortingly.

"It's okay. I'm alive." She sobbed harder and Dipper hugged her tighter. "It's all over now."
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A couple of hours later, Dipper and Pacifica were back at the RV. Dipper had just finished cleaning all the snow out of the RV and was trying to dry it out using Pacifica's hair dryers(much to her protests). Pacifica, on the other hand was busy 'getting her feet wet' with filling out the paper work on a park picnic table. Both jobs were pretty dull but it helped calm Pacifica down. The snow was all gone now and the greenery had come back in full force, nothing but grassy hills and pine trees as far as the eye could see.

She was feeling fine now so it was no surprise to her when Jack Frost suddenly appeared in front of floating above the park bench.

"Hey 'Snuggles'."

"Hey 'Frosty'."

"Oh! A playful jab back! Looks like somebody is feeling better."

"Yeah, now that I've had an time to calm down I'm actually feeling pretty fine."

"Where's your boyfriend?"

"He's not my boyfriend."

"SERIOUSLY?! After all that?! COME ON!!!"

"Listen, Dipper is important to me. I know that now. If I try to rush it though, it could ruin what we, like, already have. I can't have that. What we have now is fine too, ya know?"

"Chicken!!" Jack accused.

"What?"

"Make all the excuses you want, but it sounds to me like you're just being too big of a chicken to cannonball in and take the plunge! So disappointing!!"

Pacifica rolled her eyes and gave a sigh of defeat. "Whatever. Dipper's inside the RV trying to clean up the mess you left us and basically voiding the warranty on my hair dryers."

"Oh he doesn't have to do that. I can just make that stuff disappear."

Pacifica punched Jack in the arm. "Well why didn't you just tell us that?!"

"Okay, first off you should know by now I wouldn't feel that. And secondly, I didn't tell you for one reason." Jack smiled at her. "I'm a dick."

Jack flapped his arms down and floated to the open door of the RV while Pacifica gave him a suspicious look.

There was some light chatter inside the RV but it came to an end with a shout of "WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME YOU COULD DO THAT?!"

Jack flew out the door the RV backwards with Dipper stomping angrily towards him, wearing his newly patched hat. Pacifica's 'patch job' for his hat was basically sewing a piece of pink fabric over the hole. He'd never tell her this but it was actually pretty disappointing for him, he felt ridiculous. It was stated in her defense however, that brown was not a color she often associated with so she hadn't seen any reason to buy such a color of fabric.

Jack threw up his hands in a peaceful gesture. "Because you didn't ask! Hey, it's okay though! Look!"

Snapping his fingers with both hands, all the water disappeared.

Dipper facepalmed but then gave a sigh of defeat not unlike the one Pacifica gave. "Fine. Would have been nice if you told us you could that sooner, but fine. Hey, wait. What about that sphere of permafrost? Now that there's no prisoners there's really no need for it to be there, is there?"

Jack shrugged. "Fair enough. I'll just get rid of it."

Jack clapped his hands and the distant mountain sunk in on itself like a bad souffle. Jack's jaw dropped from honest surprise at this sight.

"Soooo..." Dipper pipped in. "Do you mean to be a dick for that one or was this one just a legitimate accident?"

"This one was just a legitimate accident!" Jack confessed.

"I should probably inform the park ranger then."

"Before you do, what happened to Bart and Ruth?"

"G-Men showed up to escort them to special hospital for magical creatures. Ruth was lucky, she broke nearly every bone in her body. If Hasbro hadn't come up with an Intensive Care Barbie then we might not have been able to find casts that could fit her. With any luck they should get a lighter sentence then what you gave them. Now if you excuse me, I have a call to make."

Dipper headed back inside and for a moment Jack thought he was alone, rubbing his arm sadly with a sigh. He turned around and was immediately reminded of Pacifica's presence as she was standing right in front of him.

"I think I have you figured out Jack."

"Huh?"

Pacifica was smiling at Jack and this confused him greatly. When people smiled at him it was usually because they thought up of some sort of nasty surprise for him but this seemed different, it was a genuine smile. He had never seen one aimed at himself so he was a little unsure what to do about it.

"You're not a dick, Jack."

"LIAR!!!"

"It's not lie Jack. You act like a dick because you're afraid. Afraid of getting attached."

Jack chuckled uneasily as he pulled on his collar. "What? That is... completely ridiculous! Why would I be afraid of getting attached. Ha ha..."

"You said it yourself. You've been around a long time. Meaning you could outlive pretty much anyone you meet, so you act like a dick so people will push you and you won't get attached. The drawback is this has made you lonely too, so you do dickish things like ruin an RV so you can get attention."

Jack gave a sad smile and floated a little lower to the ground. "That isn't true... I don't know what... what you're talking about."

"Really? Prove it! What made you want to imprison Siegfried and his goons?"

"Um well..."

"Was it how awful the deal was?"

"You see..."

"Was it how sad the villagers were?"

"Will I..."

"What was it, Jack? Huh? What was it?"

"IT WAS A LITTLE GIRL, OKAY?!"

Pacifica's honest smile got a little bigger. "A little girl, you say. Please, do elaborate on that."

"It was stupid little girl who was crying her stupid little eyes out because Siegfried and his croonies would let her go back for her stupid bear which she forgot about in her stupid house!!"

"That's your entire reason?"

"NO!!" Now it was Jack's turn to sigh in defeat. "She was just the first to make me realize that it wasn't okay to do this sort of thing to anybody let alone everybody. They were all equally miserable and I had to stop it. And I only knew one way to do that."

Pacifica stood tall and triumphant, pleased with having figured out the legendary Jack Frost. "Jack, you're rude, insulting, and don't give any common decency to anyone... but I wouldn't want to see you, like, hurt either. There's a good person underneath that mask you wear."

Jack chuckled nervously and avoided eye contact with Pacifica. "C-Cut it out, will ya?! I'm not used to getting complimented like this!!"

"Very well, we can move straight on to the matter of your bill."

This brought Jack completely to the ground. "I'm sorry, my 'what' now?"

"Your bill. We don't work for you free you know?"

"YOU DON'T?!"

"This is how we make a living, Jack! Now, how are you going to pay us?"

"Ummm...Oh! I know!" He floated to Pacifica and then bit her on the nose.

"OW!!! What the Heck, Jack?!"

"Oh stop whining! I didn't even break the skin, ya big baby. I was giving you... just a little 'nip'. Oh I crack myself up! Anyways, you can tell Dipper I just paid my bill in full. Now if you excuse me, Dipper told me Japan has these myths called 'Snow Women'. I GOT to look in to that! Maybe marry one or something! I hope you enjoy your new 'quality time' together!"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Jack gave Pacifica a salute goodbye and flew in to the sky. He got as high as the tree tops and then he vanished.

Pacifica rubbed her nose tenderly but smirked before walking off to find Dipper.

She didn't have to walk far. On the literal other side of the RV was Dipper handing Siegfried's book along with Edna's potions to what looked like a giant moth. It easily dwarfed Dipper, Pacifica would wager it to be about half the size of the RV. It had a giant fly like head with compound eyes, but instead of a fly mouth it had a couple of huge pincers. There was six limbs in total on this beast, four bug like arms and two grasshopper like legs with flat feet.

Pacifica being the former heiress she was, was no fan of bugs, so this sight may be what one would call 'alarming' to her to say the least.

"AAAAAAGH!!! WHAT IS THAT THING?!"

"WHOA!! PACIFICA, CALM DOWN!!!"

Dipper ran to her and quickly placed his arm around her to keep her from being scared further. She quickly calmed down with this, but still wasn't 'comfortable' with the new company. "Dipper...?"

"Pacifica, this is the Mothman. He's sort of a... coworker of ours! He's kind of like the... mailman for carrying evidence. Since the G-Men kept giving us lousy excuses I thought he could transport this cluttering evidence for us back to our headquarters in Washington."

This new information worked better for Pacifica than she would have thought. Now is seemed like less of 'gross creepy thing' and more like... like... well for some reason Toby Determined came to her mind.

"Actually kind of sensitive about the 'strange looks' thing. Screaming didn't really help."

Awkwardness was a feeling Pacifica was getting quite acquainted with as of late, especially as both Dipper and the Mothman stared at her patiently waiting for her to say something.

"Um... *Cough!* Sorry."

"I wish I could say I was used to it. Anyways Dipper, I'll get this back to headquarters but the boys in the lab say that they need to speak with you."

"The lab?"

"Yeah, they're getting some weird readings and they think your opinion would really help."

Dipper smirked. "Let me guess, the readings are coming from Gravity Falls?"

"Nope. Guess again."

Dipper stared at him curiously for a moment. "New Jersey?"

"Wrong again! They're coming from New York!"

"Huh." Dipper tipped his hat to him. "Well okay, we'll head there right away. Of course it's a few states away so it's going to take us a while."

"I'd better get this stuff to the evidence locker then."

The Mothman waved goodbye and started to fly away but smacked face first in to a tree.

"Ow!" He flew back to the left only to hit the tree next to it. "Ow!" Instead of flying around the tree he went back to his original flight path and smacked in to the first tree. "Ow! Who put that tree there?" Once again, he smacked in to the same tree again but this time it was at a slightly higher elevation."Ow!" Finally figuring out his problem, the Mothman up above the trees and started his journey.

Pacifica rubbed her chin in thought. "Something about him crashing in to those trees seem vaguely familiar! Like a habit from an acquaintance I know or something!"

"I know he can seem unreliable but that speed of his is nothing to sneeze at."

"Well if you vague for him, I guess I could learn to overcome my fear of bugs... one step at a time..."

"So what's up?"

"Jack's gone. I confronted him about paying us and then he bit me on the nose and disappeared!"

"What?!" Dipper grabbed her by the shoulders and looked her in the eye. "Did he break the skin with his bite?! Pacifica, this is very important! Did he draw any blood?"

"Well... no. It was more of a nip really."

"Which way did he fly off in?!"

Pacifica pointed to the front of the RV. "That way I guess!"

Dipper pulled out his gun and aimed in the direction Pacifica pointed to.

"F***ING JACK!!!"

*PLOOT!**PLOOT!**PLOOT!*

"Dipper, he already left! You're firing at nothing! I don't understand. Why are you so upset?"

"Because Jack just gave you a magical flu!"

"What, but why would he do that?"

"Because I know how to cure it! Good thing the lab is a few states away, we're going to need the time to try and nurse you back to health. I'm going to have to give you my undivided attention just to address your symptoms as they appear!"

Pacifica sighed and started to rub her arms. She was starting to feel cold now.

'That dick.'

"I'm sorry, Pacifica. This is going to rough ride for you."

"Sweetheart!"

"What?"

"Sweetheart! From now on you call me 'Sweetheart'. It's my nickname and I miss it!"

Dipper blushed and cleared his throat. "Okay then, ahem, Sweetheart."

Pacifica sneezed and a pair of icicles hung from her nostrils. "Huh?!"

"Oh dear," Dipper put his arm around her and lead her to the RV. "It's already started. Come on, let's get you to bed!"

Omake

(A/N: This omake is to be imagined with same tune as Grunkle Stan's Cash Money end credits Easter egg. Please keep that in mind.)

Jack's in Japan!

Jack flew the air above a Japanese harbor.

Jack's trip!

Jack threw a snowball at a Japanese business man who was reading a paper.

Taking in the local flavor!

He looked at the signs in the fish market and started to get an idea.

Stealing books...

He turned invisible and stole a English to Japanese translator book from a tourist.

From tourist smucks!

When the tourist started to look for his book, Jack dropped two large snowballs on top of him. The tourists head and arms stuck out of the smaller second one making him look like a snowman.

Jack's trip!

Jack phased in to a museum about ancient folklore.

Need to learn where to find Snow Women!

Jack flew out with a book about Mount Fuji.

Write down their location with a Godzilla pen!

Jack used both books to write down some directions for himself using a novelty Godzilla pen from the gift shop.

Jack's trip!

Jack flew in the direction of Mount Fuji over some Japanese onlookers.

Actually find the honeys!

Inside a cave Jack found exactly three Japanese women, who were as pale and blue as he was.

They all want to be his wife!

The snow women surrounded Jack on three sides giving flirtatious looks. They already had bridal bouquets made of snow.

Can't be tied down, need to run for his bachelor life!

Jack flew out of the cave in a blind panic.

Should've thought this through more!

Jack looked down at the snowy ground and saw the snow women were still chasing after him.

This trip was a mistake!

Jack was in a forest now but he was constantly looking over his shoulder nervously.

What?!